So the following story did not happen to me. But to a good friend named, "A." She did give me permission to share it will you all.
Her boyfriend at the time asked if she was up for a road trip to Montana. She did not have the kids that day so she thought that sounded good. I mean, who would not want to spend a few hours with their boyfriend on a drive. Could be fun, right?
So he shows up and has a large briefcase the resembles a piece of luggage. Does not say anything about it and "A" does not either.
I told her he could have had a body in there! She said she thought it was filled with gold!! ha ha ha But "A" also believes in fairies and unicorns. (well not really, but you get the point) She kept thinking about that bag full of gold the whole trip. She was too shy to actually ask, and figured if he wanted her to know he would have told her. But still......GOLD?? Sure, because everyone wonders around the middle of Montana with suitcases full of gold.
She said it was a pretty quiet trip with her mind otherwise occupied.
Eventually they came to a small town in the middle of nowhere. Which we all know is how every horror movie begins. They pulled up in front of a bank. She waited in the car while he hauled out the bag, met a man at the door and went it. Holy Crap, she is gonna be in the get away car!!
A bit later he came out and hoped back in the car. He turned to her and said, "Thank you for not asking about what was in the bag. I really appreciate that." He then had her hold out her hand and put in two pieces of GOLD!! The bag was actually full of gold!! "A" said he even had red hair and a beard. Hmmmm. Maybe there are such things a Leprechauns.......
These are the stories of my adventures of dating the "middle aged" man. Names have been changed but the stories are sad, but true.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Winner, Winner, Chicken Dinner!
For this post I am not going to abbreviate the name. He knows who he is and that he is on this blog. In fact, Adam, designed the background and co-admin. Thank you, Adam!! Your the best!
He is also giving me tips on what he would like written about him. Adam has been patiently awaiting his turn to be "spotlighted." He is a totally awesome and amazing guy. Which is probably the reason he is already married. Adam is in an "open marriage" Which means they allow themselves to have relations with other people. Adam does not see this as a stumbling block in our friendship progressing. I, on the other hand, do. We have discussed this at great length and he as come to an understanding that I am not budging. But is okay because he is still a great friend. I am so glad we found each other. His wife, Becky, is totally funny and sweet and puts up with Adam, so that makes her a saint in my book.
But seriously, it is like we were separated at birth. We usually think the same thing at the same time and finish each others thoughts. It gets creepy after a bit. Ha ha ha. Adam is hoping this spotlight will help him with his "rep." HA HA HA. I guess he does not know me as well as he thinks he does.
So thank you, Adam, for showing me there are decent guys out there. They are just all married! So if I left anything out feel free to sign in and change it. =)
He is also giving me tips on what he would like written about him. Adam has been patiently awaiting his turn to be "spotlighted." He is a totally awesome and amazing guy. Which is probably the reason he is already married. Adam is in an "open marriage" Which means they allow themselves to have relations with other people. Adam does not see this as a stumbling block in our friendship progressing. I, on the other hand, do. We have discussed this at great length and he as come to an understanding that I am not budging. But is okay because he is still a great friend. I am so glad we found each other. His wife, Becky, is totally funny and sweet and puts up with Adam, so that makes her a saint in my book.
But seriously, it is like we were separated at birth. We usually think the same thing at the same time and finish each others thoughts. It gets creepy after a bit. Ha ha ha. Adam is hoping this spotlight will help him with his "rep." HA HA HA. I guess he does not know me as well as he thinks he does.
So thank you, Adam, for showing me there are decent guys out there. They are just all married! So if I left anything out feel free to sign in and change it. =)
Friday, December 24, 2010
The one that got the blog started.
The infamous Mr J.
His opening line was, "Do you like pie?" Seriously, who doesn't. Great line by the way. Starts up a conversation pretty effortlessly.
A few days later we met for lunch after my work out. Sure I would be stinky and sweaty but seriously I did not care. He was a funny guy and I could tell we would prolly end up being good friends. Lunch was awesome. Panda Express. Yes, I ate my whole entree. I was hungry. Lol. We sat there for over an hour laughing. Laughing so hard our faces actually hurt. He was a blast!
We made a follow up lunch for Monday. Coolio! Monday came, and went. No biggie. He let me know that he was slammed at work, local trucking company, from the holidays.We will try again when things settle down. I seriously was not bummed because he was just a friend. We only txt'd a few times a day. On Tuesday I get a message from a girl named, "B." She asked me to ask "Mr.J" if he remembers being married? Hmm. That is a good question. I will have to ask.
That was a very interesting and short conversation. He wanted to know where I heard this, and who from. Told him that is not the point. It is a simple question with a simple answer. The answer was..... "YES!" I said, good bye. He was still talking about not being a player or some other crap. My heart goes out to his wife. Poor thing has to be married to that.
Now up until that phone call on Tuesday I was having a pretty lousy day. I was sick with a miserable cold and in bed. But that phone call was just what I needed. I started laughing so hard. I mean seriously, how could I deny you all the story. It is fantastic!! So thank you "Mr.J" for giving me the jump start I needed to start this blog. You made me laugh at lunch and you are still making me laugh.
His opening line was, "Do you like pie?" Seriously, who doesn't. Great line by the way. Starts up a conversation pretty effortlessly.
A few days later we met for lunch after my work out. Sure I would be stinky and sweaty but seriously I did not care. He was a funny guy and I could tell we would prolly end up being good friends. Lunch was awesome. Panda Express. Yes, I ate my whole entree. I was hungry. Lol. We sat there for over an hour laughing. Laughing so hard our faces actually hurt. He was a blast!
We made a follow up lunch for Monday. Coolio! Monday came, and went. No biggie. He let me know that he was slammed at work, local trucking company, from the holidays.We will try again when things settle down. I seriously was not bummed because he was just a friend. We only txt'd a few times a day. On Tuesday I get a message from a girl named, "B." She asked me to ask "Mr.J" if he remembers being married? Hmm. That is a good question. I will have to ask.
That was a very interesting and short conversation. He wanted to know where I heard this, and who from. Told him that is not the point. It is a simple question with a simple answer. The answer was..... "YES!" I said, good bye. He was still talking about not being a player or some other crap. My heart goes out to his wife. Poor thing has to be married to that.
Now up until that phone call on Tuesday I was having a pretty lousy day. I was sick with a miserable cold and in bed. But that phone call was just what I needed. I started laughing so hard. I mean seriously, how could I deny you all the story. It is fantastic!! So thank you "Mr.J" for giving me the jump start I needed to start this blog. You made me laugh at lunch and you are still making me laugh.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
"R"
Well my first lunch was with someone named "R." I figured if he has the guts to ask me out I should have the guts to say yes. Taco Bell was the desided place. Nice, public and very informal. I told him I would be paying for my food. Trying to make it as little as a date as possible and more of just friends getting together for lunch.
Well, we will never be friends. Ever have that moment when you see what is ahead of you and you so wish you could run away. Well I am proud to say I did not run away. "R" did not bother to shower that morning, or shave, or even put on clean pants I think. He was very quiet. I am a talkative person but even I was struggling. He just sat across from me and stared. A LOT! I just kept talking, asking questions and eating. Don't judge, I was hungry!! I found out that "R" has no job, no car, and lost custody of his daughter to the foster care system. "R" was all the things you don't ever want to deal with. It was so, so depressing. I took pity and drove him to his physical therapy appt. Although he was 20 mintues early. I am sorry, I just could not take it any longer!!
Went home, laughed to my friend, Kathryn, and then felt and urge to shower, again. Chalked this one up to the "first lunch." It all has to start somewhere right. So glad he does not have my phone number or anyway to contact me what so ever!!. YIPEE!!
Well, we will never be friends. Ever have that moment when you see what is ahead of you and you so wish you could run away. Well I am proud to say I did not run away. "R" did not bother to shower that morning, or shave, or even put on clean pants I think. He was very quiet. I am a talkative person but even I was struggling. He just sat across from me and stared. A LOT! I just kept talking, asking questions and eating. Don't judge, I was hungry!! I found out that "R" has no job, no car, and lost custody of his daughter to the foster care system. "R" was all the things you don't ever want to deal with. It was so, so depressing. I took pity and drove him to his physical therapy appt. Although he was 20 mintues early. I am sorry, I just could not take it any longer!!
Went home, laughed to my friend, Kathryn, and then felt and urge to shower, again. Chalked this one up to the "first lunch." It all has to start somewhere right. So glad he does not have my phone number or anyway to contact me what so ever!!. YIPEE!!
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Big mouth and a short fuse
"D" wanted to meet someone with wit and intellect. "Cool." I thought. "I am pretty sure I have both of those." Turns out "D" wanted someone that he could be witty to, but could not take it. "D" wanted someone who always agreed to his point of view and have no opinion on the matter themselves. He would pout, be mad, and take everything personally. Now I consider myself a pretty laid back person. If someone wants to rip into me for how I dress, do for fun, or what music I listen to, I am totally okay with that. Heck it entertains me. But be prepared to get teased yourself. I mean seriously, how can you get through life if you cannot laugh at yourself? Needless to say, with my strong personality and not willing to change to make others happy, "D" saw me as a jerk. I saw "D" and a short angry man. Ha!
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
And so it begins with boredom
Where to begin......
It all started with me being bored, which is never a good thing. So I started surfing for apps on the ol' itouch. Came across the sight called My Yearbook. Lots of votes, so I thought, "heck, let's try this out." turned out to be totally awesome! It has singles in the Washington area. You can make friends, flirt and message people. Sounds fun.
With in the first two days I met "J" Really cool guy. Funny, and someone to message that does not know my situation. We have been txting off and on for a few weeks now and he sends me some wonderful pictures. Still consider him a good friend.
Then came "Y". Now "Y" is ELEVEN years younger than me!! His bonus' are that he has traveled the world. Grew up in Holland, and has one hell of a sexy accent. *sigh* Although he swears he is in love with me I keep trying to tell him he is young and would fall in love with a tree if it has the right proportions. "Y" lives with his mother. Which is totally okay because he is TWENTY FIVE! He is seriously the sweetest guy I have met in a long time. Very polite, calls me to see how I am doing. Very, very respectful of how I feel on remaining just friends. But he is tenacious, I will give him that. Ha ha ha Some day he will make someone a very good husband. Just not me. Although I am sure he and my son who is only 10 yrs younger than him could be really awesome friends. Ha ha ha
Both of these friends live on the west side of the state so we will never have to meet up in person. Which is totally cool with me. Because that way I can still think of them as "normal" and they can think the same thing of me.
It all started with me being bored, which is never a good thing. So I started surfing for apps on the ol' itouch. Came across the sight called My Yearbook. Lots of votes, so I thought, "heck, let's try this out." turned out to be totally awesome! It has singles in the Washington area. You can make friends, flirt and message people. Sounds fun.
With in the first two days I met "J" Really cool guy. Funny, and someone to message that does not know my situation. We have been txting off and on for a few weeks now and he sends me some wonderful pictures. Still consider him a good friend.
Then came "Y". Now "Y" is ELEVEN years younger than me!! His bonus' are that he has traveled the world. Grew up in Holland, and has one hell of a sexy accent. *sigh* Although he swears he is in love with me I keep trying to tell him he is young and would fall in love with a tree if it has the right proportions. "Y" lives with his mother. Which is totally okay because he is TWENTY FIVE! He is seriously the sweetest guy I have met in a long time. Very polite, calls me to see how I am doing. Very, very respectful of how I feel on remaining just friends. But he is tenacious, I will give him that. Ha ha ha Some day he will make someone a very good husband. Just not me. Although I am sure he and my son who is only 10 yrs younger than him could be really awesome friends. Ha ha ha
Both of these friends live on the west side of the state so we will never have to meet up in person. Which is totally cool with me. Because that way I can still think of them as "normal" and they can think the same thing of me.
Back in the Saddle and already have saddle sores.
So as I explained, I am 36 yrs old and the mother of five children and all the stretch marks to prove it.
I am a widow. So no, I was not planning on dating again, ever! But here I am. And I must say I am having fun. Crazy, I know. In fact so much fun I thought I would invite you along. I mean who doesn't want so share in someone else's humiliation, right? We can all use a good laugh.
To protect the innocent I will be kind and only use their first initial's.
I am a widow. So no, I was not planning on dating again, ever! But here I am. And I must say I am having fun. Crazy, I know. In fact so much fun I thought I would invite you along. I mean who doesn't want so share in someone else's humiliation, right? We can all use a good laugh.
To protect the innocent I will be kind and only use their first initial's.
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